Toxic people are a reality of life, just like death and taxes. If you don’t live under a rock, you’ve probably encountered a few (dozen) of them in your lifetime. They’re not all the same person: the toxicity can take on different forms. But what they all have in common is that they poison your life. They’re like walking, talking, human-shaped asbestos. So here are 16 types of toxic people that will drive you absolutely nuts (if you let them).

1. Psychopaths

Psychopaths are cruel, manipulative, and impulsive. And because they have little to no self-awareness, they rarely recognize the harm they cause, or even care about it.

Lillian Glass, the woman who coined the term “toxic people,” says that “the psychopath will speak of himself in grandiose terms while blaming others and taking absolutely no responsibility for his actions.”

Research shows that psychopathy can be traced to a brain abnormality in the prefrontal complex — the part of the brain responsible for empathy, guilt, and rational decision-making.

2. Narcissists

What hasn’t been said about narcissism?

In the past decades “the narcissist” had become one of our most recognizable cultural archetypes.

You’ll hear people say things like: “Oh, he’s a raging narcissist” about someone who takes a lot of selfies, for example, or about someone who seems overly confident.

But a real narcissist isn’t necessarily someone with an overinflated ego but a damaged ego.

They feel so empty inside that they need to consume every bit of attention or sympathy they can get.

Narcissists are also known to inflict emotional pain on their victims, a.k.a. “narcissistic abuse.”

According to Alice Little, author of Narcissistic Abuse Truths, narcissistic abuse is “psychological abuse and brainwashing using intermittent reward and punishment, coercive control and withholding normal empathetic, emotional reactions to lower your self esteem.“

3. Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers

This type of toxic people isn’t listed in psychiatric manuals. But they’re just as toxic to the people around them!

Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers will always find the worst in any situation.

Try sharing good news with them — they’ll rain on your parade, too!

They’ll tell you your dreams are unrealistic, and you should get your head out of the clouds.

They’re convinced that all charities are scams, all women are liars, and all men are cheaters.

And there’s no doubt in their mind that nothing ever works out.

The interesting thing about Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers is that they don’t think of themselves as negative or pessimistic. They think they’re just realists.

4. Compulsive Liars

Compulsive liars lie the way normal people breathe: habitually, without consciously thinking about it.

It’s second nature to them.

Compulsive liars are also notorious gaslighters. They will do or say things that they will later vehemently deny. And they’ll be so convincing that you’ll start doubting yourself.

That’s because compulsive liars believe their own lies. Just think of our former president! Here’s Tony Schwartz’s quote about Donald Trump:

“More than anyone else I have ever met, Trump has the ability to convince himself that whatever he is saying at any given moment is true, or sort of true, or at least ought to be true.”

5. Gossipers

Gossip is rumors, judgmental opinions, and outright lies whispered behind someone’s back.

People who gossip tend to be passive-aggressive, insecure, weak, disloyal, secretive, and untrustworthy.

They find joy in tearing someone down or tarnishing their reputation without being directly responsible for it.

So it’s a sheepish, cowardly attack disguised as “sharing information.”

If you have a gossiper in your life, know that you encourage it not only by engaging in gossip but also by listening to it.

So if you give the gossiper the space to gossip, you are enabling this toxic behavior.

And remember:

“Someone who just helped you to speak evil about another person can later help another person to speak evil about you.” (Israelmore Ayivor).

6. Meddlers

Meddlers are people who get involved in the affairs of other people or insert their opinion where it doesn’t belong.

Busybodies or meddlers are very common. It can be your manipulative mother, toxic mother-in-law, judgmental friend, nosy neighbor, or an obnoxious coworker…

Their common characteristic is that they think they always know best and that everything is their business.

For example, an intrusive parent may be meddling in your marriage by taking sides or giving unsolicited advice.

Or, on a larger scale, one state can meddle in the affairs of another state.

What makes meddlers so toxic is that they don’t respect or even see boundaries! In other words, they can’t tell where they end and another person begins.

7. Control Freaks

Control freaks are consumed by one passion: to control everything they come in contact with.

Like meddlers, control freaks infringe on your right to be who you are and make your own choices.

This type of toxic people can appear neat, confident, and “together.”

But underneath their tidy veneer, there’s a chaos of repressed emotions, unexpressed desires, and colossal fears. And the more they try to control their own psyche, the more unstable they become.

Despite their many personal shortcomings, control freaks are usually judgmental and condescending. They feel superior to others.

And without a doubt, they are some of the most frustrating people to deal with.

8. Perpetual Victims

Anyone can become victimized in certain situations. But a perpetual victim is someone who sees the world through the lens of victimhood.

This magical lens allows them to blame others for the way their life turned out and never take responsibility for their actions.

They’re also unwilling to change their circumstances.

As Susan Carrell, the author of Escaping Toxic Guilt, says, this type of people “could overcome the adversities of their lives and move forward but choose not to. Rather than take responsibility for improving their lot in life, they look to others to make life easier for them”.

Being around a perpetual victim is exhausting. As you listen to their endless tales of woe, you’ll feel a mixture of pity and frustration.

Because no matter how hard you try to help them or just cheer them up, they seem determined to stay in the state of victimhood.

9. Martyrs

Whereas a perpetual victim feels victimized by their life circumstances, a martyr seeks out difficult or even painful circumstances to feel superior and gain sympathy or admiration. 

This type of toxic people often take on unnecessary burdens and sacrifice their own needs for others’.

But unlike someone with a kind and generous spirit, a martyr (or a person with a martyr complex) does it so they can be on a high horse at all times, seeing other people as selfish ingrates who are ultimately unworthy of their “gifts.”

More often than not, martyrs seriously overestimate their goodness. They exaggerate the importance of things they do for others and resent people for not measuring up to their twisted standards.

This type of person is one of the most convincing and dangerous manipulators you will ever encounter.

10. Righteous Rageaholics

Righteous rageaholics are always angry about some injustice, and the tiniest trigger can set them off.

Like regular angry people, they can be very reactive and “explode” in mundane arguments.

But they are also constantly fuming about things that are outside of their immediate experience or control, like rising oil prices, the kids today, other drivers, the government…

Righteous rageaholics feel very justified in their anger because they believe that the world is a screwed-up place. But the truth is, they have low emotional intelligence and unrealistic demands.

Plus, their anger makes them feel powerful and important. So when they’re not ranting about the damn Democrats (Republicans), they don’t know what to do with themselves.

11. Constant Critics

Constant critics condemn small imperfections in others while ignoring massive flaws in themselves.

Their criticism can be rude and transparent — the kind that catches you off guard and makes you wish you’ve had a clever comeback in the moment.

But it can also be covert — in the form of “jokes” and backhanded compliments. For example:

“You are so cool. I wish I was brave enough not to care what I look like.”

Constant critics think their criticisms are helpful. But they’re just projecting their own insecurities on other people to make themselves feel better.

12. Gaslighters

Gaslighters are people who deny your reality when you confront them about their abusive behavior.

They will say and do anything to make you doubt your perception, memory, or even sanity.

So talking to a gaslighter is an exercise in futility. They ignore logic or evidence and tell blatant lies.

Gaslighters are one of the most dangerous types of toxic people because they erode your sense of reality and make you doubt yourself.

Here are some examples of the gaslighting language.

• I never said that.
• You always exaggerate.
• You must have imagined that.
• You’re crazy.
• That never happened.
• Don’t be so dramatic.
• It’s not a big deal.

13. Bullies

Bullies target the vulnerable to feel superior.

It follows, then, that bullying behavior is a result of the inferiority complex.

Bullies hate themselves, so they inflict that inner pain and hate on other people to feel better.

If you watched the Netflix series 13 Reasons Why, you remember Monty — an arrogant high school jock that targeted socially isolated, vulnerable, or openly gay kids.

It is later revealed (spoiler alert) that Monty is gay and he’s been a victim of physical and emotional abuse his whole life. He hated who he was so he took it out on people who couldn’t stand up to him.

Monty is a perfect example of a bully. It’s like Kamand Kojouri said,

“Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light.”

14. Attention Seekers

Attention seekers are all around us, especially on social media.

These types of people are obsessed with being the center of attention in any situation. They will do anything and everything to get it, even if it puts them in a negative light.

For example, an attention-seeking friend will come to your birthday party but she will be uncomfortable with all the attention you’re getting. So she will concoct some ridiculous drama to steal the spotlight and make your special day all about her.

Talking to the attention seeker is a frustrating experience because they are incapable of focusing on someone else even for a second.

They don’t listen. They’re just waiting for their turn to speak so they can put the focus back on themselves.

If you confront the attention seeker about their behavior, they’ll act genuinely surprised or even offended. The truth is, they have little self-awareness.

They expect special treatment, like to hear themselves talk, and get angry when someone else is in the spotlight.

15. Paranoids

Ralph Waldo Emerson famously said: “Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.”

But that’s exactly what paranoids do: they see hidden malice and persecution everywhere.

They have deep trust issues and are convinced that people are out to get them.

This “trust no one” mentality has a way of attracting the exact scenarios where their worst assumptions are confirmed.

So even if you mean them no harm, a paranoid will find a way to misinterpret your actions or intentions so that they can reaffirm their twisted belief system.

16. Chronic Complainers

We can all be complainers when we’re stressed and want to vent.

But people who complain all the time cross the line into toxic territory. They drag other people down and spread misery everywhere they go.

Chronic complainers are some of the most toxic people to be around. They play the “woe is me” card to make you feel sorry for them.

If it works, you may be compelled to try to help them or at least brighten their mood.

Don’t waste your energy: chronic complainers don’t want to feel better. They just want to complain.

16 Types of Toxic People: Summary

To sum up, here is a list of toxic types we’ve discussed in this article:

• psychopaths (cruel, manipulative, and impulsive)
• narcissists (self-centered, never wrong, and emotionally abusive)
• Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers (the glass is always half empty)
• compulsive liars (can’t stop lying and cheating)
• gossips (judge others behind their backs and spread rumors)
• meddlers (insert their opinion where it doesn’t belong)
• control freaks (things have to go their way, or else)
• perpetual victims (woe is me, the world is so cruel)
• martyrs (suffer and sacrifice to manipulate others)
• righteous rageaholics (always angry about something)
• constant critics (condemn small flaws in others, ignore massive ones in themselves)
• gaslighters (deny your reality by distorting facts or lying)
• bullies (target the vulnerable to feel superior)
• attention seekers (always have to be the center of attention)
• paranoids (someone is out to get me, trust no one)
• complainers (woe is me, give me your pity)

If you’ve recognized yourself or someone you know in these descriptions, remember that these “types” are approximations.

In other words, they are personalizations of character traits. So we all have fragments of these “people” in us.

Recognizing your toxic traits and working on yourself to grow as a person is what separates you from truly toxic people.