Are you passionate about psychology? Do you have personal experience with difficult relationships or people? Do you want to help others heal from the past and become their best selves? Then consider starting your own emotional abuse recovery blog.

That’s how it started for me, and I want to inspire you to do the same. Your story is unique, your voice needs to be heard, and your words can reach people who are struggling and hurting right now.

However, I hesitated to write this post.

This isn’t a “blogging about blogging” kind of website and I want to keep true to my topic: untying yourself from toxic relationships, people, and beliefs.

But I also can’t deny the positive effect blogging had on me when I was at the lowest point in my life. At that dark time, I felt confused, lonely, and defeated by a toxic person who was set on assassinating my character, my family harmony, and my very soul, it seemed.

Oh, and did I mention that no contact was not an option?

I didn’t know what to do. So I started writing about it. First, on a shared platform, then on my own blog. The more I wrote and connected with other people who were in the same boat as me, the better I felt.

And suddenly there was light at the end of the tunnel. I started to see my situation differently. I started learning about emotional abuse, the traits of toxic people, and why you can’t treat them like anybody else.

This is how my empowerment and recovery began – with writing.

So if you’ve been a victim of emotional abuse at the hands of someone close to you, and have the slightest inclination to express your feelings and thoughts in writing, blogging can be a great option for you.

Why start a psychology blog about emotional abuse recovery

1. The number one reason is to help yourself heal. If you look at the biggest emotional or narcissistic abuse recovery blogs out there, you’ll see that they’re all founded by people who were themselves victims of emotional abuse.
2. The number two reason is to help other people who are dealing with emotional abuse. I bet if you asked all these bloggers why they started writing about emotional abuse, offering support to other victims would probably be one of the main reasons.
3. The third reason is education. An emotional abuse recovery is a journey of healing, acceptance, forgiveness, self-love, and empowerment. There isn’t one final destination. There’s always more to learn. Writing about topics related to emotional abuse will help you expand your knowledge and be more equipped to help others.
4. The final reason is to create an income stream. I wouldn’t recommend having this as the main reason when writing about emotional abuse recovery. But it could be a nice bonus! With so many monetization methods, it’s possible to make money from blogging in almost every niche. Plus, nothing is more empowering than taking charge of your financial future. I’ve written a separate post about how you can make money in this niche: 3 Ways to Make Money With a Small Psychology Blog

If these reasons appeal to you, you might want to give it a go.

So here is my simple, no-nonsense guide to starting your own blog about emotional abuse, difficult relationships, mental health, and growing from the challenges we are given.

Disclaimer: This blog post contains affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission at no cost to you.

1. Find your angle

There are a ton of relationship and dating blogs out there. But only a few are about toxic relationships, narcissistic abuse, or emotional abuse recovery.

And yet emotional abuse is very common (albeit hidden), with victims suffering for years before they even realize they’re being abused.

So this is a niche that isn’t over-saturated. Not only that, there is an urgent need for more information on the subject from people who’ve been through it; people like you.

You could write about emotional abuse recovery in general, or focus on a more specific topic to make you stand out. For example, you can write about

• romantic relationships
• dysfunctional family
• trauma
• narcissistic abuse
• surviving a divorce with a toxic person
• toxic work environment

Or maybe you want to narrow it down even more: like a blog about gaslighting. It can be anything! Then decide if you have some expertise in that area.

For example, I chose to write about toxic relationships because I had personal experiences in that area. I also have an academic background in psychology, and I’m constantly researching the topics I write about. So I have some expertise even though I’m not a licensed psychologist.

Another thing that attracted me to this niche is that there aren’t a lot of blogs about the darker side of relationships (compared to, say, dating and marriage blogs). So I was able to rank high for some of my website’s main keywords in a relatively short time.

2. Define your goals

Defining your goals is important because it keeps you on track and helps you decide on what kind of website you want to create.

If you want a digital journal type of website where you share your thoughts and personal experiences, you might choose economy hosting and a simple WordPress theme that highlights the content, like Typology. That’s the theme I picked when I just started my blog. There are no bells and whistles but it’s very clean, elegant, and easy to use.

If your ultimate goal is to make money with your blog (nothing wrong with that), you might want to choose a more professional hosting plan and a multifunctional theme that will make it easier for you to monetize your blog, sell products, etc.

For example, you can look for WooCommerce-ready WordPress themes, themes with a built-in subscription widget, beautiful photo galleries, social media integration, attractive design, etc.

3. Come up with a name

You should try to come up with a name that’s easy to remember, pronounce and write.

And of course, it should refer to your topic and make sense to your visitors.

But it should also not be super-specific, in case you want to expand in the future and write about other things. I know it sounds like a contradiction but let me explain.

My first ever article on the subject was about a toxic mother-in-law. When I saw how much response it got, I had an idea about creating a whole blog about it, and just calling it “ToxicMotherInLaw.com”

But then it occurred to me that I’m not always going to want to write exclusively about mothers-in-law. Toxic relationships come in all shapes and sizes, and limiting myself to one category would be a mistake.

So I decided to name my blog Toxic Ties – to include all manner of toxic relationships (as well as limiting or toxic beliefs). It’s short, it’s catchy, and everyone understands what it means.

Use a domain name generator to help you come up with the right name. Alternatively, if you’re lost for ideas, you can always go with your own name.

4. Choose a hosting platform

I’m not even going to waste time explaining the difference between WordPress.com and WordPress.org. Just go with WordPress.org — it’s a no-brainer!

However, there isn’t a clear winner when it comes to which hosting service is best. Honestly, I think they’re all pretty similar and if someone tries to convince you that one of them is VASTLY superior to the other, it’s BS.

I went with BlueHost because they have great introductory prices. At the time I started my blog, I didn’t have a lot of money to invest, so I figured hosting for less than $4/month is a pretty amazing deal…And it still is!

I use Bluehost for several websites and had no issues. And I know that if I need help, I can reach them 24/7 by phone, not send an email “request” and wait forever for the answer.

Here’s how to sign up. Go to this page to get a 50% off introductory offer, and press the “Get Started” button. You’ll be prompted to this screen:

Choose Basic plan, you won’t need anything else for now. Then type in the name you’ve chosen for your website in the left column.

If you bought the domain separately, type it in the right column. But since you actually get a FREE domain when you sign up with Bluehost, just type in the name on the left, and the next screen will tell you if it’s available.

Then fill out your personal information and pick a term:

If you just want to try it out, pick a 12 months term. But if you’re serious about giving blogging a chance, go ahead and pick a 3-year term — it offers the best savings. Then pick the extras:

If you don’t want your personal information to appear in public records of the website (I don’t), go ahead and check Domain Privacy + Protection. Skip everything else.

And voila! You got a domain name and a host for your website. Now you need to install WordPress. And since Bluehost offers an automated setup for WordPress, it’s easy-peasy!

5. Set up WordPress

Once you’re set up with BlueHost, you can set up WordPress.

Here’s a video on how to do it (it will only take a few minutes!)

6. Choose a theme

After you’ve installed WordPress (wasn’t it easy?), it will prompt you to choose one of the free pre-installed themes. There’s actually quite a large selection of free themes you can choose from, and they’re OK to start with.

Or you can press “skip this step” and come back to it later after you bought a theme you like from a place like Creative Market.

As I mentioned, I originally bought the “Typology” theme, but later I gave my website a makeover to make it look more professional. I hired a web designer on Fiverr who created and installed a custom theme for me. It’s called Toxic Ties!

Whether you buy a theme and install it yourself or hire someone to do it, make sure that it

• has all the features you want
• is mobile-friendly (since most people read blogs on their phones)
• has room to grow (when you inevitably become a successful blogger!)

I also have Genesis Framework for both of my sites. To be honest, I don’t understand it completely. I just know it’s good for your website. You only have to buy it once, and then you can use it for multiple websites, so that’s pretty neat.

7. Create quality content

OK, this is the nitty-gritty of the whole thing: creating useful, original, well-written posts.

Don’t worry if you have no experience writing for an online audience, or if you’re not a natural writer. There are tons of tutorials online about writing quality blog posts.

Not to mention, you can use Grammarly. It’s a free online editor that’s my go-to, even though I have a good grip on grammar and punctuation.

I use Grammarly because of how many times it caught mistakes I didn’t notice. And it’s so easy! You just create an account and download a Chrome extension.

Initially, I used the free version for basic edits. But when I was writing an eBook, I decided to give the premium version a try. And I was hooked!

I’m not a native English speaker, and I have a tendency toward long, intricate sentences. Grammarly makes my writing so much more readable! It can point out an awkward turn of phrase or even rephrase a sentence, offer synonyms for words that are often overused, and just makes your writing so much more clear and concise.

Besides using an online editor, the best writing advice I can give you is: when you write a post, think about your reader. Imagine him/her, give them a name. Write to them specifically, as if you were writing to a friend.

And paragraphs, LOTS of paragraphs! Most people read blogs from their phones, so even relatively short paragraphs can look bulky on mobile.

Here’s a more detailed tutorial to help you dramatically improve your blog’s readability: 10 Simple Ways to Make Your Blog Posts More Reader-Friendly

The consensus is that you need at least 20-30 blog posts before launching your blog. But writing 20-30 blog posts can feel overwhelming.

You can start with just a few posts, and add more as you go. This way you won’t repeat the same mistakes with your new posts because you’ll be learning with every post you publish.

Just make sure you add new content consistently, especially in the first year of blogging.

8. Make sure your content is SEO-friendly

I’ll be honest, for the longest time I was completely mystified by the abbreviation “SEO.” I mean, I understood what it stands for (search engine optimization), and I’ve read what feels like a million articles about it, but I was still clueless.

If you feel confused too, you’re not alone! I kind of hate all this SEO business. But there is one little tool that makes it so much less intimidating. I’m talking about a plugin called Yoast SEO.

Yoast SEO

If you could only do one thing for your blog posts, optimize it with Yoast SEO. All you have to do is follow the prompts and do what it says. And it WORKS. I can prove it.

When I just started my website, I wasn’t very intentional or consistent with it (in fact, I could probably write a whole blog post about all the things I did wrong). But there was one thing I did right – optimize for SEO with Yoast SEO.

I started this blog at the end of 2017 by publishing one blog post. The next year I published a total of 2 (!). I know, sounds bad. But I just didn’t take it seriously, was busy with a toddler and freelance copywriting gigs, and only wrote something when I felt like it.

In 2019 I picked up the pace a little and published a whopping 7 new posts. Far out!

The reason I started posting more is that I realized that my 3 lonely pathetic posts are actually getting a decent amount of traffic, despite the fact that I invested almost zero effort into their promotion. I think I shared them on Pinterest once or twice. That’s it.

But there were hundreds of daily visitors from Google (a.k.a. organic traffic)! And the only logical explanation was that it was properly optimized for SEO, so Google was able to index those posts and rank them pretty high.

In fact, it didn’t take me very long to become Google’s #1 search result for keywords “toxic grandparent.” Yeah. With no social media sharing.

9. Create an Email Opt-In Form

This is the step I neglected for a very long time! And I regret it more than anything.

First, I was confused about how to do it, and which service to go with. Second, I felt intimidated by the idea of creating regular newsletters for my subscribers on top of creating new blog posts, promoting them, and every other blogging task. Here’s how I resolved these two dilemmas.

After a lot of research, I went with MailerLite. I liked that I can use a free version for up to 1,000 subscribers (it will take me a long time to get there so I’m good with that!).

But the best thing about MailerLite is that it’s so EASY to create and customize subscription forms.

I tried MailChimp before and I just got confused and abandoned it. The simplicity of MailerLite is a HUGE selling point for me because, as I said, I’m not good with all this 001001010101 stuff. I don’t do code, HTML, or web design. I just want to write!

Along with a subscription form (or a pop-up), you might want to create a freebie of some sort to entice people to join your mailing list. Then craft a welcome email with a link to a freebie, and voila!

Here’s a simple subscription form I created in under 5 minutes (coming up with the freebie took a little longer).

If you, like me, are not sure about what to send to your subscribers, no pressure! Go with the pace you’re comfortable with, and don’t let yourself get overwhelmed.

In the beginning, you can just send out simple monthly round-ups of your latest posts.

And when you have something more to share, you’ll be glad you have a list of subscribers who are already interested in what you have to say.

10. Go all in on Pinterest

It took me a while to join the party (I always was a late bloomer), but I can’t imagine not using Pinterest, now that I’ve decided to take blogging seriously.

Except…I hate social media. It’s pretentious, fake, and a huge time-waster. I don’t use Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, and until recently, I wasn’t using Pinterest either.

But here’s the phrase you’re going to hear a lot: Pinterest isn’t social media, it’s a search engine.

So the same rules apply: if you optimize all your pins with keywords, pin consistently and focus on a specific niche, Pinterest will index your pins well and see you as an expert in your field.

But it’s a lot of work, and it takes a lot of time — time that could be used more productively, like writing awesome content and spending time with your loved ones.

So when I found out that there is a tool that can automate at least some of the pinning for me, I was relieved…seriously.

Tailwind

I practice a mixture of manual and automated pinning. With Tailwind I schedule all of my own pins ahead of time, making sure they go into group boards, as well as my own boards.

Then I’ll log in a couple of times a day to manually share 15-20 pins from other people. I don’t have to, technically, but I don’t want to spam my followers with the same pins over and over.

Want to give Tailwind a try? Here’s a free month where you can see for yourself if it’s something you want to sign up for.

If you do, it’s only about $100 a year, so all in all it’s a reasonable enough investment. If not, no worries! Manual pinning is fine for when you’re just starting out.

However, using Tailwind isn’t enough. There’s a whole science to mastering Pinterest.

But don’t worry, it’s not complicated! You just have to know the exact steps to take to turn Pinterest into a traffic goldmine!

So I decided that I needed some help from a pro, and I invested in a Pinterest course.

Pinterest course

Just like with SEO, I felt like I’d read a million blogs with the same topic “How to use Pinterest to drive traffic to your blog,” but the information always seemed incomplete, and I still felt confused.

So I realized that I needed someone to kind of take me by the hand and walk me through the whole thing, from start to finish. And that someone was Ana from The She Approach.

Her course “Making Pinterest Possible” offers a step-by-step plan to get the most out of Pinterest. It’s everything you’ll ever need to know about the damn thing.

And what makes it so easy to implement is that each chapter has a checklist at the end, so you’ll be checking things off as you go, following a specific, proven-to-work plan. Try everything, then figure out what works for you.

I am telling you — don’t waste your time with free courses that always leave something out. Invest once (it’s only $35) and do everything right, the first time.

Because at the end of the day, it’s an investment in yourself, in your own potential, and in your future.

Here’s what happened with my traffic after I started implementing the tips from Ana’s course and using Tailwind.

As you can see, the traffic doubled and tripled, and it still keeps growing! Note that this is the screenshot of my blog’s traffic ONLY, not of all the pins I share.

What if you don’t think you have what it takes

OK, timeout. That’s a toxic belief right there: I DON’T THINK I CAN DO IT.

Where would you get a crazy idea like that?

You can and you will!

If you’re not convinced, I’ve written an in-depth post to help you triumph over your blogging fears. It’s jam-packed with useful information and inspiration.

Read it here: 10 Limiting Beliefs About Blogging That Hold You Back

I’m positive that almost anyone can succeed at blogging, given a little passion and a lot of perseverance.

Today I have 150,000+ monthly views (not bad for a small blog), and I’m not going to tell you that it’s easy. It’s hard work. But it’s doable.

I’m not a licensed psychologist. I don’t have a journalism or a marketing degree.

I’m not a millennial with a glamorous shoe collection that gets views and shares just for being pretty.

I’m not a tech wiz AT ALL. Almost everything on my website is done with YouTube tutorials.

I’m an almost 40-year-old psychology student who is OK at writing, that’s all. AND English is my second language.

Trust me when I tell you – if I can do it, so can you.

Best Emotional Abuse Recovery Blogs to Get Inspired

Looking for ideas? Here are some of the best emotional or narcissistic abuse recovery blogs and resources out there for your inspiration.

• Melanie Tonia Evans
• Narcissist Abuse Support
• Kim Saeed
• The Narcissist Family Files
• The Narcissistic Life
• Narcissist’s Ex Wife
• Narcissistic Partners & the Relationship Agenda
• Free From Toxic
• Break the Cycle
• Love is Respect
• Narc Wise
• Coaching with Dr. Heidi
• Grow with Christine
• Emotional Abuse Recovery Summit

But don’t get overwhelmed and intimidated by these big blogs! Everyone started small, it takes time for the blog to grow and evolve.

Browse around, and make a list of everything you like. Then try to create a blog that emulates that, but is still unique and personal to you.

Good luck! Leave a comment if you decided to start your own psychology or emotional abuse recovery blog, or if you have any questions. I’ll be happy to help in any way I can!

NEXT

How Writing About My Toxic Mother-in-Law Changed My Life

How to Deal With a Difficult Parent: 6 Strategies to Keep Your Sanity

Stuck at Home With a Toxic Person: 7 Proven Ways to Keep Your Sanity